Blow Out
I LOVE DISCOUNT TIRE CO
mpany. I’m at Discount Tire Company. I got a free water. I didn’t ask, I just took it. They won’t mind. They’re fixing my tire. No. That’s impossible. They’re replacing my tire, the one that exploded on the interstate. It was weird when that happened.
I’m pretty sure the founder of Discount Tire Company had bad politics but bought a James Turrell Skypsace for my alma mater. That’s the way I understand it. He was a billionaire. I won’t look it up. All billionaires have bad politics. Not all billionaires buy James Turrell Skyspaces for “party schools.” It’s not total redemption, but an ethically neutral action, the gifting of a Skyspace.
Discount Tire Company has fantastic air conditioning. Everywhere in the country, their waiting rooms smell the same. I’m liable to fuck up my tires anywhere in the country, which is part of why I love Discount Tire Company. What else might I fuck up?
Pants.
Heels of boots.
Expensive camera!
Discount Tire Company is from Arizona, like me. Discount Tire Company used to be famous for their commercials where an old woman fucks up a tire shop window with a tire. I’m not really clear what message those commercials were supposed to send. I wish old women would do more riots. It would be a really funny development in the world, like as the next thing on CNN all the time. Nonstop old lady riots.
Discount Tire Company is from Arizona like me.
Currently I’m at a Discount Tire Company in Tennessee. The guy who helped me is also from Arizona. He told me this because he saw my area code, and then my license plate, and then my baseball cap. He said he went to Pinnacle. I wonder, did he come to work at Discount Tire Company because he knows it is somehow the closest thing you can have to a real southwestern experience in the Smoky Mountains? Probably on a subconscious level, he did. It’s not that there are saguaros. There aren’t. It’s not creosote or gila monsters or mesquite. The Mexican food nearby is lousy. It’s not any of that. I don’t actually know what I mean! But it might be something about the waiting room.
How long will it take me to stop on a wet road?
Snow Stumper #51
The weekly column where I try to answer the photo-questions posed by David Webster’s 1968 book Snow Stumpers, one by one.
Are these animal tracks?
my answer: maybe? i would never think so, but you’re confusing me. maybe there’s a really hot snake.
actual answer: TOP: The winding tracks were made by little streams of melting snow water
BOTTOM: Small hunks of snow rolled down the bank, leaving the dotted trails.
Worm
Snow in July !
Discount Tire Company is from AZ?!